The other day, I was speaking with my roommate about a certain personal situation that she ended up handling online. This sparked a discussion concerning how much easier, in certain respects, it is to talk about certain subjects to certain people online rather than face-to-face or on the phone.
This got me thinking about the possible reasons behind this phenomenon of social grace within the context of the cyber world. Why exactly is it so easy to deal with people or to present yourself positively on the Internet and not in reality?
For some, it is much easier to talk on messaging clients such as America Online Instant Messenger or Yahoo Instant Messenger. When replacing your person with a screen-name, you and the person with whom you are conversing essentially become subhuman. You cannot actually see the other person nor can he or she see you. Instead, you both begin to equate one another with a screen-name, an IP address and a user icon. There is absolutely no personal attachment.
There is also a sense of anonymity that is strangely appealing to the public. Behind the screen, you can be anyone. No one knows you outside of the messages and pictures you send them. You are in complete control of how people view you, and for once, you have the ability to define and construct yourself as you wish to be seen.
While I do think it's important for people to have the ability to define themselves as they would like to be seen, I feel that this ability is abused through blatant lying via the Internet. Instead of using this as a tool of rediscovery and reformation, society is obsessed with pretending to be someone other than whom he or she is. This completely negates the original intention of defining one's own self.
Aside from messaging services, there is also a plethora of other Internet services offered in the name of impersonal contact. Web sites such as myspace.com and thefacebook.com give people both a chance to meet one another and also a license to stalk. I mean, what is the purpose of getting to know people up close and personal when you can find everything you ever wanted to know through a carefully organized synopsis of personal interpretation of their own personality? Whatever happened to meeting people and getting to know said people without the aid of a keyboard and monitor? While these online profiles are meant to give a brief overview of a person's character, they become an exact representation of the person in the eyes of the outside world. The world does not learn anything beyond what is featured in the online profile, nor does it wish to.
Consequently, the personal relationships between people in today's society dwindle quickly. The fun of the first stage - the "the getting to know you" portion - has been taken out of the sweet game of friendship entirely. One no longer needs to "waste time" in this phase for it has already been mapped out for us on a blueprint that allows us to learn the life story of whomever we wish. This phase is boring and can now be skipped entirely because you were able to spend five minutes of your life reading a person's identity. The fact of the matter is society would rather do this than spend hours, days or even weeks getting to know the foundation and constructs of an individual straight from the source. Interpersonal relationships are being formed simply by hitting 80 down the information super highway. This is yet another example of America's need for fast results. Americans want a close friendship or a relationship immediately. We don't want to have to sift through conversations and meetings. We want to be able to double-click on a profile, find our soul mate on Ebay and call it a night.
And while we're listing misuses of Internet space, let's discuss the role of online journal services in relation to the insecure masses masking their own personal issues. Many of these online journals, such as livejournal.com, offer their clients the option of joining groups. They are meant to unite people from all over the country with the same interests. Usually, when one joins a group, it is with the intentions of being friendly, open and personable. However, as the impersonal nature of the Internet progresses, so does the impersonal nature of the Internet generation. For some reason, these Internet options give people an unsaid permission to condescend, to be a jerk and to generally be rude. Online journal services that offer group options end up serving as a vehicle for people to project their anxieties and insecurities out on those on the other side of the screen. Whether it is people's grammar, their constant misspellings or their user icon that is attacked, there is a certain growth of social Internet unrest and cyber discrimination. It becomes easy to attack those whom you look down on for there is no longer a face and body to confront - only the steady glow of text flowing from the screen.
With all of our modern technologies and capabilities, we have the power of infinite knowledge and personal development at our fingertips. And yet, we insist on using this power both as a means of masking who we truly are and as a means of disconnecting ourselves with the physical reality of humanity.
Kristin Manganello is a Rutgers College junior English major. Her column, Media, Society and You appears on alternate Thursdays.
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