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Week in?review: laurels and darts



The new Rutgers Cinema has laid its roots, but will it last? These auditoriums will be classrooms by day, movie theaters by night. Yes, you read that right. In a greener world, all entertainment complexes might be fused into learning establishments. Really, why not? It’s difficult to make an argument for empty, unused facilities. Added perks of the cinema include free Saturday morning cartoons and special, TBA events. A laurel decorates the University’s new, daring effort.



If you’re studying at Alexander Library, leave your laptop unattended and a thief notices, shame on you. A double-edged dart points at laptop-stealers and laptop-leavers alike. Survey says there is no organized effort here — people are simply shortsighted and selfish. Thievery is on the rise at University hot spots and busy cities alike. Lock up your valuables, vagrants. Nobody’s going to remind you again.



Facebook’s brand new graph feature is deep and deserves equally intensive care. A laurel weaves its way around the famous social networking website, as it interprets a gigantic web of connections. The platform makes previously untapped information useful and offers a fresh outlook on users’ social footprints. Advertisers, employees, investors and even consumers should benefit from the feature, if used correctly. In the meanwhile, take a second to get those pesky stains out of your history. You’ll thank yourself later.



This dart swerves left and right before reaching a middle point: Beyoncé’s alleged lip-sync at the 2013 presidential inauguration is not nearly as reprehensible as its biting media coverage. Headlines screamed about her fakeness but the realities of the situation were largely ignored. It was cold. It was not singing weather. All of that aside, the rapid-fire release of an un-sourced subject is unprofessional, improper journalism. Student journalists take offense and zero inspiration from such slanderous, subject-to-change stories.



Grab your patriotism: Women in the United States are no longer banned from fighting in combat. Finally! Traditional notions of combat versus noncombat positions have been completely blurred, especially after the war in Iraq. It’s time for a more cohesive, integrated approach to armed forces. Nothing is off-limits for a determined woman in 2013 — not the frontlines of battle, not the realities of war and definitely not the right to wear the uniform. A laurel sits pretty on the lapel of every U.S. soldier.



Under-Armour, long-sleeved shirt, sweatshirt, jacket, gloves, pants, two pairs of socks and a knit scarf: still cold. I’m sure you’ll get bored of this dart before you read it; you already know, you poor creature. Social networking sites have blown up, and if we see one more screenshot of the daily forecast, we’re moving to Hawaii. Now, go warm up. You’re turning purple.

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