ESCHLEMAN: Breast Cancer Awareness Month should not be (misogynistic) joke
Column: Shower Thoughts
Last week, I was walking on College Avenue when I saw a spray-painted bed sheet hanging on the right side of the Chi Phi fraternity house. Neon pink letters spelled out “CHI PHI (Heart) BOOBIES” with a painted pink cancer ribbon. I shook my head in disbelief at what I was seeing.
October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. I organized fundraisers during this time every year when I was in high school. I was a member of the Student Movement Against Cancer club, and during my time there, I made gift baskets for cancer patients in the community. On one particular occasion, I remember club members and I brought a Christmas tree to a single mother whose arm was in a sling after she had surgery to treat her cancer. I will always remember both her tiredness and gratitude.
In my sophomore year of high school, I lost my grandfather to a form of stomach cancer. And this past month, I lost my aunt to a rare form of cancer that ultimately took her life in a few short months. My uncle is now a widower, and my 7-year-old cousin will grow up without her mom. Even though these are not cases of breast cancer, these experiences show that cancer, in any form, destroys people’s lives, and I do not think that is a joke.
I think most people, including the Chi Phi fraternity, are well aware of cancer’s grave consequences. But the fraternity's bed sheet message makes it quite clear that discussing difficult topics makes people uncomfortable, so people resort to insensitive humor. Before you roll your eyes at me for being overly politically correct or overly sensitive, I encourage you to consider my perspective as someone who has been affected by cancer and to consider my concern as a woman.
“About 1 in 8 women will get breast cancer during her life," according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. And at a campus of more than 36,000 students, I am confident many students have been affected by breast cancer in some form. As these students and their families walk down College Avenue and will likely see Chi Phi’s message, the joke not only diminishes the harsh reality faced by cancer patients and their families but also objectifies women.
People may dismiss it as classic locker room talk, but I am tired of making excuses for this kind of behavior. Chi Phi is an organization of adult men. If their members are publicly displaying a message that is immature and misogynistic, they should be called out for it. Any young men walking around campus are learning from them. And right now, their message is saying that men are entitled to talk about women’s bodies and their private areas disrespectfully because they are men.
The message is also saying that Chi Phi only cares to acknowledge Breast Cancer Awareness Month because it concerns an area on a woman’s body that its members deem to exist solely for their pleasure, which is inherently false.
Maybe, Chi Phi should care about Breast Cancer Awareness Month because it actually affects people’s lives and could affect the women in its members' lives. I am not assuming these men as individuals actually do not care. Maybe breast cancer has affected their own lives, but what I am saying is that their language makes it seem as if they do not care, and their message is hurtful and objectifying to those who see it.
Greek organizations are supposed to value community service, so I hope they are doing more than just hanging this poster. I hope they are fundraising for breast cancer research organizations or maybe even considering having their members shave their heads for the cause. But if all they have is this sign, it sheds a terrible light on their fraternity and Rutgers as a whole as prospective students and their families tour campus.
I think actually raising awareness about breast cancer is more important than broadcasting an insensitive message to assert one’s toxic masculinity. This poster is a symptom of a deeply rooted societal issue of misogyny. This belief is the same reason why men catcall women on the street and openly rate them with their friends. This entitlement combined with the countless excuses that are made to ignore this behavior is what is problematic.
My question is when will we stop saying "boys will be boys" and actually hold men accountable for their language and their actions?
People do not like to admit when certain societal behaviors are problematic. People do not like to admit when society has a problem. If serious issues make you so uncomfortable to the point where you genuinely cannot talk about them and have to make insensitive jokes, think about the people who have to actually experience cancer or misogyny and how painful it is for them.
People will argue Chi Phi's speech is protected by the First Amendment, and it is. But hanging a different sign that maybe says, “Breast Cancer Awareness Month” would shed a much better light on Chi Phi and make the surrounding community feel more supported, which I argue is something to consider.
Sara Eschleman is a Rutgers Business School sophomore majoring in marketing and minoring in English. Her column, "Shower Thoughts," typically runs on alternate Thursdays.
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