April 25, 2019 | 56° F

Serial dating leads to no good if not communicated correctly


Finding a significant other is a big part of being a young adult. Regardless of all the jobs, internships, clubs and classes you are involved with, we as human beings still have the compelling desire to find someone to occupy our time with in a romantic capacity — there are very different methods of achieving this though.

College students in general are notorious for not being the most committed while dating, but sometimes there is a method to the madness. A lot of people find themselves going out with multiple people over a certain period of time in pursuit of finding a significant other, even though there are many positives and negatives to this dating style known as serial dating.

I know what most people are saying to themselves while reading this — there is actually a coined term for taking others out and about getting there hopes up, while simultaneously pursuing others, but the topic itself is more complicated than just thinking it is wrong to do this.

Daniella Celik, a Rutgers Business School—Newark sophomore, has some strong opinions on the subject.

“Well, it all depends on where you draw the line on when you are going to let people know they’re not the only one in your life,” Celik said. “You have no obligation to tell anyone you just met that you want to be monogamous with them or even who you ate dinner with the night before, but just make sure to make it clear that you’re not only seeing them or anything like that — there’s nothing wrong with seeing if other people are a good fit for you as long as they know what’s going on."

Dating is a complicated game and not everyone sees this type of dating in an understanding light. Georganne Casper, a School of the Arts and Sciences first-year student, has a very different view on going about dating in such a loose fashion.

“In my opinion, a serial dater may have an underlying, emotional fear of being alone," Casper said. "Therefore, experiencing a wide spectrum of relationships whether it be romantic, casual or just to have a friend around.” 

Dating overall seems pretty simple — you’re looking for another person to keep you company and that makes you happy. Someone could find them self walking in circles through the dating experience — their issues maybe internal rather than other people not being a good fit. 

Relationships can feel limiting and going into something too quickly can be daunting, making many millennials reluctant to commit to others at all. Serial dating most definitely can have negative repercussions, considering not everyone has a sympathetic approach to it. Going out on first dates is usually exciting, but also nerve racking considering most of us put a lot of effort into having a good first impression.

When you find yourself going on a lot of first dates, you will find yourself getting better at making a good first impression and how to be more comfortable in your own skin. This comes with others enjoying being around you, but if someone doesn’t really interest you and they come to find out they were just another date they will probably develop some less than desirable feelings towards you — think of it like the first cuts during baseball tryouts.

Overall, I can conclude that serial dating is a style of dating that more people take part in than we might realize, and that it can be an effective means of meeting someone fitting for you as a partner. Just keep in mind that if you are going to pursue this lifestyle, you should probably do your best to be transparent about your intentions and that some people may not be too favorable about your decision making.

Nick Demarest

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